[EnglishMonger 英語屋さん]

オモシロ英語雑学 またまた、ジョークで英語の勉強です。オチはどうしてそうか、と、少し、クイズ的なところもあり、考えないといけない所があります。いくつか、出しましょう。頑張って理解して笑ってください。

ジョークのポイントは「場面の転換」と「言葉遊び」です。各文章のトップに番号がついていますが、私のHPのJOKES のページで記載している番号です。

解説を読んで下さい。ここに飛んで下さい。→ここをクリック。

43

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts."
The doctor asks, "What do you mean?"
The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. When I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts."
The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you. You've broken your finger!"

ヒント:痛みの原因は?

44

“Daddy, what is an alcoholic?”
“Do you see those 4 trees, son? An alcoholic would see 8 trees.”
“Um, Dad – there are only 2 trees.”

ヒント:で、お父さんはどうだったのでしょう?

50

What's the difference between a man and a dog?
A man wears a suit, a dog just pants.

ヒント:これは、pant の意味にかかっています。

55

Two factory workers are talking.
The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day-off."
The man replies, "And how will you do that?"
The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.
The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?"
The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb."
The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day-off."
The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?"
The man says, "I'm going home, too, because I can't work in the dark."

ヒント:まぁ、最後の一行です。

58

There were three restaurants side by side.  One day one of them put up a sign. It is "The Best Restaurant in the City."
The next day, the largest restaurant on the block put up a larger sign.  It is "The Best Restaurant in the World."
On the third day, the smallest restaurant put up a small sign. It is “This is the entrance.”

ヒント:entrance だから、どう?

62

A man is strolling past a lunatic asylum when he hears aloud chanting. ''Thirteen, thirteen, thirteen!" goes the noise from within the mental hospital's wards. The man's curiosity gets the better of him and he searches for a hole in the security fence. It's not long before he finds a small crack, so he leans forward and peers in.
Instantly, someone jabs him in the eye. As he reels back in agony the chanting continues "fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!"

ヒント:数字は何を言っているのでしょうか?

64

One night in Washington, when Trump was president, there was a heavy snowfall. When the president woke up in the morning, he looked out the window and saw a beautiful blanket of snow covering the White House lawn. 
He was snapped out of his peaceful reverie when he noticed, written on the lawn in yellow snow, "Donald Trump is an asshole." 
The president got very angry and summoned the FBI and CIA. 
“I want that urine analyzed," he ordered them. .'And I want to find out who the culprit is right now, without delay! This is top priority!" 
  Early in the afternoon a representative of the two agencies reported back into Trump. "Sir," he said, "we have tested the urine and we know whose it is. However, there is some good news and some bad news. Which would you like first?" 
  "Oh, no," said Nixon. "I guess you had better give me the good news first." "Well, sir," said the man, "we analyzed the urine, and it is Vice President’s." 
  "Oh, no," cried Nixon, and then suddenly the realization hit him: "That's the good news? What could the bad news possibly be?" 
The man answered him, "It was in Mrs. President's handwriting."

ヒント:最後の文の意味をよく考えて下さい。

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